Hey Look At My Butt!

I seriously just spent ten minutes trying to take a picture of my own butt.

It didn’t really work.  My dog was just watching me like, “Yeah, I do that sometimes too. But you’ll never catch it, I speak from experience.”

I couldn’t help it. I was wearing my new Lululemon pants and I have fallen in love with the way they make my butt look. In the words of my sister-in-law Carrie, “Aren’t they just glory on your bum?”

Yes Carrie, they are.

I don’t know if it’s the pants or the workouts that my husband has been putting me through but seriously ya’ll, my butt looks good!

You can tell a lot about a man by the kind of workouts he creates for women. I have come to the conclusion that my husband is a butt guy. Every time I step foot into the gym he feels compelled to set my buns on fire.

Yesterday was no different. Here is the workout he put me and my friend Tara through.

We’ll call it…

“These Buns Are On FIRRRRE!”

(Little known fact, my husband has a huge crush on Alicia Keys.)

Warm-up:

Spiderman lunges and Toy soldiers

Strength:

3 x 10 weighted bridges

hip thrust

Do you see my Lululemon sign winking at you?

WOD:

We loaded up the prowler until it was so heavy that we couldn’t run with it while pushing. He had us push it across the gym and then do overhead kettlebell lunges back. Then switch and rest while the other person does it. We did this five times, I think. It kicked my butt so I don’t remember.

prowler pushes

This may not sound like much but your heart wants to explode as soon as you stop pushing the prowler. It’s so weird.

kettlebell lunges

The lunges killed me! We used 16 kg kettlebells and it really worked our core. Which, according to the muffin top I’m sporting here, seems to be something I struggle with.

I feel like I’m back on track, the Veggie Challenge has turned out to be a great idea!

Veggie Challenge Day 2

Breakfast:

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I made a veggie scramble with these lovely veggies. I only saute veggies on high because I like them to caramelize like this…

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I add the spinach last because I just want it to wilt a little. Then I push all of the veggies aside and cooked up some turkey sausage then the eggs. It was topped off with a little Siracha or “Rooster Sauce”.

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Brent puts “Rooster Sauce” on everything, so much so that when Bridget was in first grade she felt compelled to throw the bottle away because she felt like her daddy had a “problem”.

Lunch:

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Brent and I just tossed some of the cooked left over shredded chicken in Frank’s Red Hot Sauce and made salads with yogurt ranch and cheese. I usually love this but for some reason I thought the chicken tasted gross. I still ate it though because I was starving after that workout.

Dinner:

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Brent made home-made baked chicken tenders using boneless skinless chicken thighs instead of chicken breast. I thought it sounded gross but it was SO yummy. It tasted more like fried chicken because of the dark meat. We served it up with oranges and broccoli madness. Broccoli madness is just something that I make and I’m not sure I’ll be successful in sharing my recipe but I’ll try.

Broccoli Madness

1 head of broccoli chopped into florets

2 tbls chopped red onion

2-3 tbls dried cranberries

2- tbls chopped or slivered nuts (salted is best)

dressing:

(This is the part that gets tricky you’ll have to play with it to your taste)

1 tbls of lite mayo

2-3 tbls red wine vinegar

1-2 tbls sugar or agave nectar

In a small bowl mix together mayo, red wine vinegar and sugar. Keep adding vinegar until the mixture is pinkish in color and cancels out most of the mayo taste. Mix in the sugar until you’ve found a tasty balance between sour and sweet. (I really suck at this.) Lightly pour the dressing over the broccoli then add the other toppings and mix.

This is the only way we eat broccoli at our house. We tend to get heavy-handed on the cranberries but it just makes it yummier. If you are too scared to try my version because I’m horrible at writing recipes you can refer to this recipe. It has more yummy stuff in it like bacon and cheese but is definitely not diet friendly. Good luck!

The Pee Pee Dance

I’m so confused… after having two not so great weigh-in’s in a row I told myself that I was going to up my calorie intake to what is recommended for my current weight to see if my metabolism has slowed down. I did that for about two days. Then, I got a big slap in the face this weekend when Brent hung up my Lululemon hoodie and turned to me and said, “Are you ready for this?”

For those of you who haven’t read Operation Lululemon, my husband and I have a bet as to whether or not I can zip my jacket up by Valentine’s Day. If I can, then I get to go shopping for more Lululemon attire. If I can’t then he get’s something. I’ve only got two weeks to win this challenge. Now is not the time for science experiments!

What do I do?! I can’t plateau anymore but I don’t want to waste time trying to figure out what is going on. This is so weird because a few months ago I would have jumped at the chance to have an excuse to eat more. But I’m on a roll and don’t want to screw that up. Most importantly, I want to kick my husband’s butt!

Speaking of butt kicking…

I met up with my friend at Crossfit Bodywerx today for a round of “Brent is mad at me for stealing the covers last night so I must suffer”. Take note… if you can help it NEVER let your spouse be your personal trainer. My problem is that my husband is just so blasted good at it that I just can’t help myself.

I tried to get Brent to take pictures while we worked out but he told me he was my trainer not my photographer… Well excuse me Mr. Big Trainer Pants!

Here is the workout and the terrible pictures that he did manage to take…

Warm-up:

(The following were done down one end of the gym and back again.)

Toy Soldiers

Spider Lunges

10 air squats

Using a medicine ball as a spotter to help you focus on form

3×5 barbell back squat

Once again going light and focusing on form

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Holding the bar hurt Morgan’s shoulder so she did it with a kettlebell behind her back.

WOD

(workout of the day)

 Part 1: The Butt

 3 rounds of 20 walking lunges and penguin walks

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You look really special while doing this but it KILLS your butt.

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Here I am lunging… well, that actually looks more like the pee pee dance. Let’s try that again.

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Oh brother, that seriously looked so much better in my head.

This is the point where Brent informed me that he was not the photographer. After looking at the pictures I’m pretty sure he just knew he wasn’t any good at it. But Penelope thought it was rude…

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At this point I was too tired to care and we weren’t done by a long shot.

Part 2: The Tummy

Tabata Intervals

planks

flutter kicks

twisting med ball tosses (5 burpees for each time you drop it)

Part 3: The lungs

Three rounds of shuttle runs and 15 russian kettle bell swings

We had to do these as fast as possible. My times were 28 seconds, 25 seconds and 24 seconds.

After that workout I didn’t care how many calories I ate just as long as I got some food in my belly. I’m still a little confused but I’m going to try not to overthink it. If I’m hungry I’ll eat a little more if I’m not I’ll eat a little less. All I know is that I better be able to zip up that hoodie without looking like a ten pound sausage in a five pound casing.